This Year And How To Survive
Golden,
If there’s one thing I want you to be it’s—nevermind
I still remember last year and how I’ve never liked me
That bastard knew I didn’t like it either, and so it goes…
Figure up all the moons and suns,
divided by how many times I cared,
and you’ll end up with another day
where the city is still lousy with all of it.
All the streets the hookers,
record stores
and windows
the happy hours
and the drunks
and love
and constant motion
and despair
squinting at the sky yelling so someone will notice
Don’t we all just want someone to notice?
Our quirks, our shortcomings, our happiness?
It’s those mornings alone when you really feel it, or hear it rather.
That voice whispering about the future and how it’s here and how it’s fleeting
and how your feeling a little like it’s about damn time something went my way.
We’re not getting any younger.
That only happens in novels and Brad Pitt movies.
The basis for figuring it all out is throwing it all away
and realizing the words nothing and everything
were both made up by men as lost as the best of us.
And the best of us are really just tragically as normal as the worst;
Jogging for a position in a race that never ends.
So don’t worry about it.
Haunt which ever cities you want.
I can tell you there are many to choose from
and as excited as you may be they all end up the same.
It’s not a good thing or a bad thing, it just is.
Change what you want about the world around you.
And if something doesn’t work right
go into a bar on a Friday night
and ask a stranger if they have ever wanted to give up.
Everyone’s answer is the same and three letters wrong.
It’s proof were not alone.
It’s sanity, it’s comforting, it’s a new year now,
and I’ve survived.
I’m 24 and scared as ever.
If I’m not still saying this in five years like I was the five before this
then I’m not sure how I’d feel.
I think it keeps me on my toes.
So be brave and not only to survive but live.
Take it all in and try to smile a bit more often.
I can’t tell you how many times
I’ve had a shitty day turn around
because someone simply smiled
and said good afternoon to me.
It’s these unexpected simplicities
that surprise you
and make it that much more worth it.
And like us, they just want to be noticed, I’m sure.
Amazing and pure as the light that leads us through the darkness.
May it guide us onward where all is illuminated.
